I’m no expert, but based on the number of friends that I’ve talked about online dating with, it seems that about 4 in 5 have tried it at some point. As I slowly sipped my Chardonnay at happy hour with a few girlfriends, I listened to them discuss a date one was going on later that evening. I asked where she met this one. Her response, “I think OkCupid, but I don’t really remember. It’s our second date.”
In my experience, a second date with someone you met online is getting pretty serious. I had a small stint with online dating in the last few months. I was just over trying to meet men at bars that weren’t just looking for one thing. And that whole thing about going to the park or a coffee shop and trying to look approachable? Hah, ok.
It all started with a small number of friends joining this site or that app. I was curious about it and if anything good came of it. When college friends from out of town would visit, they’d update their location to the city that never sleeps to see what new men they might discover.
So after all, I decided to hop on the online dating train to see who else was riding it. I didn’t think I would find my future husband, but at least just to see what all the rage was. The rage was pretty nonexistent for me. I had a few dates, and even those were seriously forced. It’s hard to choose who you actually reply to and only basing it on the things they say, a picture, and maybe an age.
There was the guy that was cute in his pictures, then after meeting him, I was pretty sure he was gay. I’m not sure what was up with that- though another GBF (gay best friend) wouldn’t hurt! One guy that actually seemed decent and made me laugh a lot, but didn’t want anything serious; we didn’t talk after that date. I guess I have a sign on my head that say’s Bride To Be?
Then another guy who I cancelled on the night before because I just didn’t feel like going and he was already kind of annoying. And he somehow convinced me the next day that I should meet him. He texted me throughout the day to make sure I was still going, then when I finally got there, I decided immediately I didn’t like him. He had it in his head that my body facing away from him and my unthoughtful “nice” response to everything meant I was really into him. “I can tell by your body language that you really like me, you’re just afraid to show it.” LOL.
A few other dates here and there, that didn’t lead to anything more than that. Yes, first dates can be awkward, especially if you’re concerned about being catfished. The thought never really crossed my mind, until the previous guy told me he searched my profile picture on the internet and found my blog. Isn’t that something you shouldn’t really share?
Online dating is great for some people, and if you have the patience and get enjoyment from going on dates a few nights a week, then why not?? I applaud those of you who put yourselves out there and go through all the idiots to potentially find the one or two good ones. If you find any extras, send them my way, otherwise I think I’ll be spending my time at the park and coffee shops for now.
Who has experience with online dating? I want to hear all about it! Have questions or need advice about dating? Email me at Advice@LetsTalkTwenties.com. Believe me, whether online dating or not, I’ve got some pretty solid experience and great resources to reach out to for further advice.
Happy hunting my sweet darlings!